Abbreviated version this week. I know it's not Neil's picks but let's see if a NBA fan or someone who dedicates their entire life to college football (me) knows the lay of the land better. Also, i just pick winners versus specific scores, last thing I want to happen is my score to get picked up by a coach and another team use it as motivational, locker room material like Coach Nutt did with Neil's picks.
Editers Note: Fishoil is a elite fan, and this should be just as accurate as the other editor's picks, found on the site's front page.
UNC (+2.5) vs. South Carolina
Before we get started we should recognize this game is played at the Carolina Panthers stadium (home of Cam Newton). Bank of America stadium, or BOFA stadium for short, is a perfect place to watch a college football game. Having said that, let's hope Spurrier tells Fedora about his x factor bofa prior to kickoff. Spurrier should get some enjoyment yanking each of his quarterbacks this evening. He just needs to find his Cleopatra to get Pharaoh (Cooper) the ball. Fedora's offense might give USC's JUCO/newcomer heavy defense some trouble, but their defense can't be an worse than the tire fire UNC put on the field last year. "Sho*t, let 'em score, that way we can get the ball back." - Larry Fedora on the headset talking to his DC. Fans should be reminded of the NIxon presidential term with all the three and outs tonight.
Fishoils'' pick: South Carolina
Western Kentucky(-3) @ Vandy
Those of you with children, have you ever watched your child repeatedly run into a door, wall, or other object requiring a process to move but the child cannot figure it out? That's Vandy's offense, and while WKU won't be mistake for the 85 Bears on defense, if they score over 30 against Vandy, that's like scoring 150 points against any other team.
Fishoils pick: Hilltoppers find the Commodores on land and cover teh spread. Vandy should change their name to the commode a doors, because once you open it you're exposed to waste.
ULM(+35.5) @ Georgia
Grayson Lambert, a Virginia transfer who lost the job this spring, will start for Georgia. In case you don't watch college football 5 nights a week like me, losing the starting quarterback job at Virginia makes one a prime candidate for some people heppin' and should not make Georgia fans feel good about their signal caller. Lambert is a very handsome QB and should inspire confidence. Chubb and co. run wild, and I'll take UGA with their penchant for beating the breaks off and scoring 50+ vs. non power five schools.
Fishoil's pick: Georgia to cover. Richt to call fewer than 13 passing plays.
Louisville(+10.5) vs. Auburn
Neil covered in his picks, but let's see if Petrino finishes the fourth quarter in the Georgia Dome this time around. In a battle of Georgia's former secondary (3 starters on Saturday afternoon once patrolled the secondary between the hedges) look for Petrino to grind the clock down and make it a game with the fewest number of possessions possible. Auburn's defense stopped fewer people than the Tallahassee police department last season, so it will be interested to see how an inexperienced, but talented D Line, holds up in the opener. Louisville lost a couple of interior lineman and two safeties to the NFL, but I don't see them taking a step back this season. In a surprisingly low scoring affair, I'll take teh points and Petrino's front seven.
Fishoil's picks: Louisville (I'm sure I'll get a text from a friend when Auburn is up 31-7 in the third quarter)
UTEP(-33) @ Arkansas
Will Bert wear crocs? How much will he sweat under his windbreaker in the Labor Day weekend heat? Will one of their true or redshirt freshmen step up with Johnny Williams getting hurt? How many linemen touch the ball this game? Will Bert try and end this game in under 2 and a half hours so he can watch the Big10 nightcap? Razorbacks make Bill Clinton proud and run through UTEP like he ran through receptionists.
Fish oil pick: Arkansas, Bert mentions something about speaking Spanish in his post game presser.
Bowling Green (+21) @ Tennessee
Tennessee's last offensive coordinator in the Phil Fulmer era, David Clawson, took the head coaching job at Bowling Green after his four month stint in Knoxville. He now coaches at Wake Forest, which means he was instrumental in this photo.
Dave Clawson will never get enough credit.
Fishoil's pick: Vols to cover. Drew Richmond pancake springs long run for Vols to go up by 30.
Arizona State(+3) vs. Texas A&M
I'm excited about this game. On Saturday, a guy I know is getting married. This means I won't be able to watch some college football games in the evening, since wedding receptions don't have TVs. On the bright side, this game should last just north of 5 hours and eclipse 250 plays knowing each team's tendencies and penchant for allowing touchdowns, so I should catch the fourth quarter. This is the closest we'll ever come to watching a game where it's like Tyrone Nix is defensive coordinator for both teams. Kyle Allen should improve, and if America is lucky, we'll get to watch Kyler Murray (highlights look just like Manziel's) direct the Aggie's offense at some point. Arizona State returns an explosive offense as well. Let's hope the scoreboard at NRG stadium has three digits for each team and insurance on lighting. Even with Myles Garrett destroying men and a de facto home game in Houston, I'll take the points because I have no idea what's going to happen.
Fishoil: Arizona State. imo.
ULL (+17) @ Kentucky
Kentucky fan A: What would the line be if ULL played at Rupp?
Fan B: More than 17.
Fan A: Good point, when is Midnight Madness?
Fan B: No idea, but excited I'll be able to curve my drinking once I can start watching shootaround and update my list of 4th graders Cal is recruiting once I don't have to think about Kentucky football anymore.
Fan A: Yeah, we're a minor league NBA team. Go Cats. BigBlueNation.
Fan B: Neil McCready is a NBA fan.
Fan A: Thanks for the reminder. I almost forgot.
Fishoil's pick: ULL getting 17 points is too good to pass up. Postgame prediction: Patrick Towles watching SportsCenter highlights of competent D1 programs by himself on Saturday and quietly opening up his laptop to apply as a transfer student to real schools. His twitter handle is Patty Ice (like the delicious beer Natural Ice, but with Patrick in the name), so I might pick Kentucky to win the national championship.
New Mexico State (+36.5) @ Florida
Does Treon Harris throw with his non dominant arm? No idea, but I do know New Mexico State sure could use a hand, and Houston Nutt already lives in New Mexico. If the game ends early, Florida could get a few guys arrested before Sunday. All I know about NMST. football is their head corch is Doug Martin. Doug Martin's wikipedia picture looks like this.
I would give the exact same look in every photo I took if I had to live in Las Cruces and coached the Aggies too. Maybe he can go out with some Florida players after the game and numb the pain.
Pick: New Mexico State. Florida had six scholarship O Lineman in the spring, and Treon Harris throwing passes.
Alabama(-10.5) vs. Wisconsin
If Bama loses they'll be on a losing streak against the Big10, which would be the gift that keeps giving. Instead, I'll preview Finebaum on Monday.
Fan: Paaaaaaawwwww. You see the Tihde? Saban has us back playing again.
Paul: Yes, the Tide certainly rolled (Jim Halpert shoulder shrug/eye brow raise at camera).
Fan: Yeah, say what you want about the War of Northern Aggression, but General Grant didn't have to gameplan against Saban
Paul: I don't know if that really applies here.
Fan: Sure it does, this game we played the role of General Sherman and Wisconsin's defense was Georgia.
Paul: What did you think about the Tide's QB play? 4-18 isn't a great slash line.
Fan: Are you sure that wasn't a scarecrow?
Pick: Bama finds semi competent QB play and stops the run for a relatively easy Crimson Tide win.
MSU(-22.5) @ Southern Miss
The three stars versus the two stars. Coast trash vs. country boys. Drinking problem vs. thinking problems. Nine o'clock kickoff. I feel alive. I digress, Dak's backup should get some run in the second half as MSU begins the quest to make Mississippi their State once again.
Pick: MSU
UT Martin @ Ole Miss - Old Miss
McNeese State @ LSU - LSU
SEMO @ Mizzou - Missouri
Editers Note: Fishoil is a elite fan, and this should be just as accurate as the other editor's picks, found on the site's front page.
UNC (+2.5) vs. South Carolina
Before we get started we should recognize this game is played at the Carolina Panthers stadium (home of Cam Newton). Bank of America stadium, or BOFA stadium for short, is a perfect place to watch a college football game. Having said that, let's hope Spurrier tells Fedora about his x factor bofa prior to kickoff. Spurrier should get some enjoyment yanking each of his quarterbacks this evening. He just needs to find his Cleopatra to get Pharaoh (Cooper) the ball. Fedora's offense might give USC's JUCO/newcomer heavy defense some trouble, but their defense can't be an worse than the tire fire UNC put on the field last year. "Sho*t, let 'em score, that way we can get the ball back." - Larry Fedora on the headset talking to his DC. Fans should be reminded of the NIxon presidential term with all the three and outs tonight.
Fishoils'' pick: South Carolina
Western Kentucky(-3) @ Vandy
Those of you with children, have you ever watched your child repeatedly run into a door, wall, or other object requiring a process to move but the child cannot figure it out? That's Vandy's offense, and while WKU won't be mistake for the 85 Bears on defense, if they score over 30 against Vandy, that's like scoring 150 points against any other team.
Fishoils pick: Hilltoppers find the Commodores on land and cover teh spread. Vandy should change their name to the commode a doors, because once you open it you're exposed to waste.
ULM(+35.5) @ Georgia
Grayson Lambert, a Virginia transfer who lost the job this spring, will start for Georgia. In case you don't watch college football 5 nights a week like me, losing the starting quarterback job at Virginia makes one a prime candidate for some people heppin' and should not make Georgia fans feel good about their signal caller. Lambert is a very handsome QB and should inspire confidence. Chubb and co. run wild, and I'll take UGA with their penchant for beating the breaks off and scoring 50+ vs. non power five schools.
Fishoil's pick: Georgia to cover. Richt to call fewer than 13 passing plays.
Louisville(+10.5) vs. Auburn
Neil covered in his picks, but let's see if Petrino finishes the fourth quarter in the Georgia Dome this time around. In a battle of Georgia's former secondary (3 starters on Saturday afternoon once patrolled the secondary between the hedges) look for Petrino to grind the clock down and make it a game with the fewest number of possessions possible. Auburn's defense stopped fewer people than the Tallahassee police department last season, so it will be interested to see how an inexperienced, but talented D Line, holds up in the opener. Louisville lost a couple of interior lineman and two safeties to the NFL, but I don't see them taking a step back this season. In a surprisingly low scoring affair, I'll take teh points and Petrino's front seven.
Fishoil's picks: Louisville (I'm sure I'll get a text from a friend when Auburn is up 31-7 in the third quarter)
UTEP(-33) @ Arkansas
Will Bert wear crocs? How much will he sweat under his windbreaker in the Labor Day weekend heat? Will one of their true or redshirt freshmen step up with Johnny Williams getting hurt? How many linemen touch the ball this game? Will Bert try and end this game in under 2 and a half hours so he can watch the Big10 nightcap? Razorbacks make Bill Clinton proud and run through UTEP like he ran through receptionists.
Fish oil pick: Arkansas, Bert mentions something about speaking Spanish in his post game presser.
Bowling Green (+21) @ Tennessee
Tennessee's last offensive coordinator in the Phil Fulmer era, David Clawson, took the head coaching job at Bowling Green after his four month stint in Knoxville. He now coaches at Wake Forest, which means he was instrumental in this photo.
Dave Clawson will never get enough credit.
Fishoil's pick: Vols to cover. Drew Richmond pancake springs long run for Vols to go up by 30.
Arizona State(+3) vs. Texas A&M
I'm excited about this game. On Saturday, a guy I know is getting married. This means I won't be able to watch some college football games in the evening, since wedding receptions don't have TVs. On the bright side, this game should last just north of 5 hours and eclipse 250 plays knowing each team's tendencies and penchant for allowing touchdowns, so I should catch the fourth quarter. This is the closest we'll ever come to watching a game where it's like Tyrone Nix is defensive coordinator for both teams. Kyle Allen should improve, and if America is lucky, we'll get to watch Kyler Murray (highlights look just like Manziel's) direct the Aggie's offense at some point. Arizona State returns an explosive offense as well. Let's hope the scoreboard at NRG stadium has three digits for each team and insurance on lighting. Even with Myles Garrett destroying men and a de facto home game in Houston, I'll take the points because I have no idea what's going to happen.
Fishoil: Arizona State. imo.
ULL (+17) @ Kentucky
Kentucky fan A: What would the line be if ULL played at Rupp?
Fan B: More than 17.
Fan A: Good point, when is Midnight Madness?
Fan B: No idea, but excited I'll be able to curve my drinking once I can start watching shootaround and update my list of 4th graders Cal is recruiting once I don't have to think about Kentucky football anymore.
Fan A: Yeah, we're a minor league NBA team. Go Cats. BigBlueNation.
Fan B: Neil McCready is a NBA fan.
Fan A: Thanks for the reminder. I almost forgot.
Fishoil's pick: ULL getting 17 points is too good to pass up. Postgame prediction: Patrick Towles watching SportsCenter highlights of competent D1 programs by himself on Saturday and quietly opening up his laptop to apply as a transfer student to real schools. His twitter handle is Patty Ice (like the delicious beer Natural Ice, but with Patrick in the name), so I might pick Kentucky to win the national championship.
New Mexico State (+36.5) @ Florida
Does Treon Harris throw with his non dominant arm? No idea, but I do know New Mexico State sure could use a hand, and Houston Nutt already lives in New Mexico. If the game ends early, Florida could get a few guys arrested before Sunday. All I know about NMST. football is their head corch is Doug Martin. Doug Martin's wikipedia picture looks like this.
I would give the exact same look in every photo I took if I had to live in Las Cruces and coached the Aggies too. Maybe he can go out with some Florida players after the game and numb the pain.
Pick: New Mexico State. Florida had six scholarship O Lineman in the spring, and Treon Harris throwing passes.
Alabama(-10.5) vs. Wisconsin
If Bama loses they'll be on a losing streak against the Big10, which would be the gift that keeps giving. Instead, I'll preview Finebaum on Monday.
Fan: Paaaaaaawwwww. You see the Tihde? Saban has us back playing again.
Paul: Yes, the Tide certainly rolled (Jim Halpert shoulder shrug/eye brow raise at camera).
Fan: Yeah, say what you want about the War of Northern Aggression, but General Grant didn't have to gameplan against Saban
Paul: I don't know if that really applies here.
Fan: Sure it does, this game we played the role of General Sherman and Wisconsin's defense was Georgia.
Paul: What did you think about the Tide's QB play? 4-18 isn't a great slash line.
Fan: Are you sure that wasn't a scarecrow?
Pick: Bama finds semi competent QB play and stops the run for a relatively easy Crimson Tide win.
MSU(-22.5) @ Southern Miss
The three stars versus the two stars. Coast trash vs. country boys. Drinking problem vs. thinking problems. Nine o'clock kickoff. I feel alive. I digress, Dak's backup should get some run in the second half as MSU begins the quest to make Mississippi their State once again.
Pick: MSU
UT Martin @ Ole Miss - Old Miss
McNeese State @ LSU - LSU
SEMO @ Mizzou - Missouri
